Category Archives: Offseason Moves

Like a Record Baby, Right Round Round Round (Get it? A Rotation Joke!)

In addition to Brandon Belt flashing some leather on defense, Sandoval slugging dingerz like the Panda of old, and reports of Mark DeRosa’s death appearing to be greatly exaggerated, one tidbit of “news” has actually appeared, when Bruce Bochy announced an order for the stellar Giants pitching rotation.

Timmy remains the Ace, followed by Jonny, Matty, Barry and Maddy. Compared to last year’s rotation, Lincecum stayed as the ace, Zito got a major demotion, Cain stayed steady, Sanchez got a good promotion, and Bumgarner took the 5th starter spot from Todd Wellemeyer’s cold, dead fingers. If this is, indeed, the rotation that Bochy plans to take into the regular season, it raises a few questions.

First of all, Matt “The Sheriff” Cain. In 2010, Cain had an amazing year, and by some accounts a better (more consistent, at least) year than Lincecum. Cain has the makings of an Ace, and would be on most other ballclubs, which makes it curious that he would remain in the third role. Present elbow issues aside, he’s Mr. Reliable. He devours innings like some bad 2010 Pablo Sandoval joke – in his 5 full seasons, his 1049.1 IP are the 8th-most in the MLB during that time. In 2010 he lasted fewer than 6 innings only five times; he lasted fewer than 5 innings only twice. He is the picture of stability, working for a 3.00 ERA in August 2010, while the pitching staff as a whole (including Cain) had a 4.55 ERA. He threw over 100 pitches in 21 of his 33 regular-season starts, and he didn’t give up an earned run in the post-season. Plus he has a great head of hair.

So, why isn’t he the #2 pitcher?

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The Tease of Pitchers and Catchers, and the Folly of Sports Fiction

A visual representation of my heart during the offseason.

Pitchers and catchers have reported, and whoop-dee-friggin’-doo. Now not only are we forced to live without baseball to watch, but we have to live with the knowledge that baseball is happening somewhere, but nowhere that we get to see. It’s lovely to read the stories that have abounded with the beginning of Spring Training (Tim Lincecum abandoned his mustache crusade), but it’s just another step in the excruciating winter that is the offseason.

With football still over, basketball still boring and my XBOX perpetually on the fritz, I’ve been filling my non-work hours with the calming, intellectual Spartacus: Blood and Sand, a show seemingly intent on seeing how many dead bodies and exposed breasts can be fit into an hour-long show.

But even while Spartacus is about the noblest of competition – gladiatorial combat – it falls victim to the most common problem of such fiction. The series is called Spartacus, so whenever our hero by the same name steps into the arena, it’s a pretty safe bet that he’ll be walking out of it alive before too long.

That’s the problem with even the greatest sports fiction: it’s utterly predictable. Continue reading →

The Ballad of Chavy and Tulo

Yes, he did score in this play. Remind me, did the Rockies win the division in 2010?

While the Giants had a relatively quiet and predictable off-season, our Rocky neighbors to the east had quite an expensive one, extending shortstop Troy Tulowitzski’s contract until 2020, with a team option for 2021, and all it cost was an additional $114 million ($129 million with the option). Small potatoes for a team eager to keep one of its best, most popular players, particularly when that player is incredibly talented, right?

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