Ignoring for just a moment the last half inning of last night’s game, the whole thing was pretty spectacular. Madison Bumgarner cruised like he was facing the Rangers on Halloween, but with better control. Melky Cabrera had two hits, Posey had a key hit after falling behind 0-2, and even Brett Pill stole a base.

But man, Ryan Theriot. Three hits and a walk, and his hits came in key spots. Theriot never promised to deliver all that much offensively, but his beginning of the year was especially awful, when he put up a .179/.217/.196 line in 20 games (61 PAs). Now, Theriot had the age-old “I was injured all along” excuse, but in this case it may have been legitimate. In the six games since he’s been back, Theriot has hit .381/.458/.524 with three walks, and two of his eight hits for extra bases. This seems a bit unsustainable, of course, but hopefully it means that Theriot’s overcome what ailed him before. If Theriot can even manage to put up his career averages of .281/.342/.352 (83 OPS+) from this point on, it would be a substantial upgrade over Emmanuel Burriss or even Joaquin Arias. If Gregor Blanco, Melky Cabrera and Angel Pagan all keep up what they’re doing, an upgrade from the second-base position would be huge. Theriot.

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Fee-fi-fo-fum! I smell the blood of a Diamondback. Be he live, or be he dead,: I'll grind his bones to make my bread.

I really wonder what’s going through Paul Goldschmidt’s mind right now.

In the Diamondbacks farm system, the name “Lincecum” is spoken in hushed tones, as tales of his disappearing changeup are told in campfire stories and pranksters with long wigs jump out of the bushes to scare the bageezus out of gullible young players. Each player has a story of facing the mighty Sampson and flailing wildly at a pitch that just isn’t there anymore.

Goldschmidt heard these stories, like the rest of them. He was called up on August 1, at the beginning of Arizona’s series against the Giants, and he felt the familiar butterflies begin in his stomach. He had managed to poke a single against Matt Cain the day before in his first at-bat, but had failed to get on base after that.

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Captain Kirk

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