$500,000 doesn’t buy you much in baseball. A few bats, a few balls, an Ishikawa or two. But that’s what 39-year-old former batting champ, present suspension server, and future Hall of Famer Manny Ramirez signed for with the Oakland A’s. Why did the A’s do this? Because when your $36 million mail-order bride asks for a boob job, you give it to her. And if The Dreaded One can sniff his 2010 production, the A’s can put up with his hijinks. But let’s look at every non-Athletic team and figure out why no one wanted Manny to Manny all over their team.